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Bad Event, Still in My Mind

I performed solo dance in my school when I was 9-year-old. I practice a lot for long time. I practice dance that my mom taught me. Tari Kipas, its name.
I was really happy, I could dance on the stage.

At that day, I dance so quite, audience keep silent.. and you know, the music is the traditional music, Gending Karawitan. So... Quiet...

But Oh no!! Danger come to me!
My teacher bored to my dance, and he send me 2 clowns. They make me no comfortable to dance. And they destroy my dance!
One of them threw candy cover, and you know what!!! The cover is sticky in my foot. Oh.. I'm shock.

The audience was laughing to me. I could not accept it. My mom that seeing me through the window outside hall, look so angry and disappointed.

Finish I dance, I run to room behind the stage, and I was crying so loud!! My mom accompany me and give me advise in order not to cry again.
My mom went to the teacher, and she was angry to him, but... Oh my God! He was innocent to my mom.

Because of this event, I really feel so down. I don't have confidence anymore.
I am so afraid to sing in front of class, give presentation in front of class, raise my hand when I want to ask to teacher, then... I just don't want that people laughing in me, because I would be crying..
When I was in Junior and Senior High School I really be a down girl, I keep distance with my friends, my classmate. Because I think, I was not in their level.

But when I was a student of university, I try to wake up, and wake up... Wake up from the down life. The first I do is follow the choir community in my church, second, try to sing in front of race. Then, the third is try to give presentation in front of class. Forth, I try to ask something to lecturer. Fifth, I repeat that activities again and again..

Until now, I still learn. I hope I could be a firm and intelligence woman.
God Bless Me.

^_^

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